G-man!

This boy rocks my world. Seriously. His squishy skin, his always pursed "ooooohing" lips, his constant "mum... MUM..." and his need for snuggles and touch. He is love and joy.

This week was a rough one for us. Gavin had his surgeries on Tuesday. This meant we were required to be at the Children's Hospital at 6:15 in the morning. In true Amanda fashion, I set the alarm for the time we wanted to leave, not the time we wanted to get up, so our day started very rushed (hence the greasy hair and lack of makeup).

We left at just after 4:30 and Gavin did not sleep at all on the way there. He was doing okay until we had to change him into hospital clothes. Then the tears started.

Luckily we had Dora on the blackberry to occupy him while we waited.

He was right ticked that they put a hospital bracelet on Monkey and everytime he tried to hold Monkey, he'd just scream all over again. We finally met with both surgeons and the anesthetist and then came the hardest moment ever - handing him over to the nurse. He was so rip-roaring mad. They kept telling me that he'd be asleep in 3 quick breaths and I had no choice but to leave him. And yes, I'm not ashamed to admit that I cried. Shush it.

So, Chris and I left to go get some tea and basically try to kill some time. We were told it would be an hour and a half. After 2 hours, we still hadn't gotten the call to go into Recovery. When we finally were allowed in, Gavin was hysterical. They had tried to warn us ahead of time that he could be out of it and upset, but they said it typically only lasted for 15 minutes or so.

Gavin screamed and kicked and yelled and fought for almost an hour and a half. Literally broke my heart as nothing could console him. He was constantly kicking and left bruises all over me. The nurse at one point said, "He's strong for two and a half!" I corrected her, saying he was only 22 months. Yup, that's one big strong boy. Finally, he collapsed from sheer exhaustion.

He slept for an hour and a half and woke up the boy we all know and love. He promptly asked for some juice and ate a few cookies and started running around. We were soon released from the hospital with some instructions on how to care for his incision and told to limit his activity.

Yeah, that part hasn't really happened, but he seems to be healing well. We've already noticed that he can hear better, he chatters a lot more and he's no where near as loud as he used to be. All good changes. As for his nether region, it's some interesting shades of black and blue, but doesn't seem to bother him very much at all.

Thank you for all your prayers, for Gavin and myself. We definitely felt them. My heart goes out to the families who have to visit Children's often for much more serious reasons. We are grateful for our healthy children and we are glad that this ordeal is over!

A Better Life Wellness Centre

Yup. It's true. Chris and I have taken the plunge and started a business. We're renting an office and everything.

When I started my journey with Ideal Protein in September, I fell in love. I believed in the program and had amazing results. I knew right away that I wanted to share IP with as many people as I could. I was able to coach a few people and I loved it. I loved knowing that I was making a positive difference in the lives of others.

In order to be a coach for Ideal Protein, however, you need a business front - a chiropractor's office, a health food store, whatever, as long as it's not in your house. So we started looking around and eventually, after a few setbacks, found a place to rent in Morden and got approved by Ideal Protein. We finally got the paperword back that allows us to open a business bank account. Woo hoo! This whole process has been overwhelming to me and every step seems to take so stinkin' long! But, we're almost there!

While waiting for office renovations to be completed, I've been allowed to sell products and coach from my house. I LOVE this! I am so passionate about IP and the results that I'm seeing. I love meeting with my clients throughout the week and being able to encourage them to lead healthier lifestyles. I love wracking my brain to come up with new ways to use vegetables or make healthier choices. Again, I love knowing that I am making a difference.

I am definitely a changed person. I'm not saying IP is for everyone. It takes a lot of commitment and dedication. But this definitely has been the answer for me. 75 pounds gone and I've been happily maintaining for 3 months. I firmly believe in this program and in my clients! I have to keep things anonymous, but I will say that I have 2 clients who have lost over 50 lbs, 5 clients who have lost over 30 lbs, 2 clients who are no longer needing to take their diabetes medications, and a whole whack of clients who are happier within their own skin. I feel so blessed, knowing that these people are making better choices and that I can help them along the way.

I'm excited to be stepping out in this new adventure. Nervous? Oh yeah! But, when I get overwhelmed, I look at my statistics. Because of my journey with Ideal Protein, the world is over 1000 lbs lighter. Insane!

A Better Life Wellness Centre, opening soon in Morden. Wish me luck!

Real

I know my blog lately has been boring to most of you. There hasn't been a lot of meat to my posts. They mostly feature my kids because it's a safe subject. I'm still leery to be real and to share. I had a lot of hurtful comments a while back and they are still rattling around in my head. Yup, literally have voices in my head. I wish we could all just be supportive of each other. I wish that jealousy didn't play a part in our interactions. But rather than focussing my attention on that, I've been pouring myself into... well myself. My relationship with my husband, who truly is my best friend. The past few weeks have reminded me of this. My relationship with my kids. Now that I'm not doing a million cakes, I have time to focus on them and not be confined to the kitchen. My relationship with my friends. I have an amazing support team. I have such a group of lovely ladies who know, get, and understand the real me and I love them for it. Without all of the above, I would have been lost the last little while. And to all of you who are still reading - thanks for sticking with me. I know private is a pain, so hopefully it'll be worth it!

And birthday week is officially over.

This year, parties went out of control. We had a family party on Sunday, then her actual birthday was Friday, so we had a small get together. We love cake pops around here, so I made cherry chip cake pops and cookie dough cake pops.

Then we had the party at the gym. Best idea ever. Lots of room to run and play and no mess in my house. Here are my tissue paper puffs that I made.

And the unicorn/rainbow theme went out the window when Chelsea declared she didn't want a fondant cake, but rather a candy cake. So a candy cake we made! She still didn't eat a piece, in case you are wondering.

We set up a craft table and took a break from the running, swinging, screaming to do a fun, messy craft. They turned out really great.

My 4th birthday princess.

Parachutes rule. I had so much fun!The mini skateboards were a hit for young and old!

Me and my chubbachubbchubbs. And the grand finale. We managed after many hours, phonecalls, and trips out shopping, to get an amazing bike for Chelsea. Princess to the max. It was worth it all - the look on her face was amazing.

And that concludes birthday weekend.

I learned a lot of lessons.

1. I am ridiculous about birthdays. This proved that.

2. Too many kids = stress for me. The kids were all so behaved, but I felt like I was neglecting the parents. I love visiting and didn't even get to talk to everyone.

3. My daughter is only 4. Even though she'd been talking about her cake and party for months, she was so overwhelmed that she just kept randomly crying.

4. After all we did, she declared that the best part about her weekend was her treat bags. Candy necklaces go a long way, people.

She's 4!

There will be a post coming soon, but how on earth has it been 4 years! Four! Unreal. Love this girl.

Sunday's Festivities

We celebrated Chelsea turning 4 with Chris' family on Sunday. This was just a small family get together, but of course there had to be cake. Chelsea had asked me for a cake with two owls sitting on a rainbow because "I like rainbows and you like owls, right mom?" I finally got a chance to make an owl cake and I think it turned out super cute! Chelsea, however, wasn't phased. The problem with her seeing awesome cakes all the time is that they don't wow her at all anymore.

I even made the cake rainbow inside and still she was like, "Nice cake, but can I go play?"

This guy however, was VERY excited about seeing a cake, touching a cake, eating a cake - heck the mention of the word cake gets this guy going!

Last year, I realized that my daughter really doesn't like cake. I had big big plans for her cake for Saturday's party - unicorns, rainbows, butterflies.... but, after a good discussion during which she informed me that she really doesn't like fondant, we decided to make a cake she would like. Stay tuned, because I can guarentee you that I have never before made a cake like the one we have planned.

faux-toes

So I chopped my hair this week. Here is my "before". Now, yes, I realize I have no make up on and my hair is greasy, unwashed and unstyled.

And the "after." Now, despite how I'm smiling. I'm really not loving it. I had to go back once and get the back chopped off, because initially she had left it like a mullet. Now, I hate how super short the layers are on top. I keep hoping it'll grow on me. Haha.

And, I'm trying to make sure I take more pictures of myself with the kiddies. Before my weightloss, I hid from the camera. Now, I love capturing who we are, in our jammies and everything!

He is just so squishy. I love it.

My heart

These two. Never did I think I could love like this. I have enjoyed every minute of spring break wtih them. It's been great having Chris home for the week to help with playing, activities and naptimes. It's been so good having no preschool, music lessons, dance class, or anything else to distract us. The usual attire in our house - C in a dress and G, pantless. No biggie. His big stickie-outie lips make me laugh every time. Three going on 16, this one.

When did they get so big? We're about to enter birthday season around here. They are almost 4 and 2. Ack!

Spring Break

I made my husband's day today. We ordered pizza for supper and I told him that I budgeted enough from our income tax return for him to buy a new BBQ. He literally left 15 minutes later to buy one. Haha. It's not one of those super fancy ones with any bells or whistles, but it's clean and it won't burn my chicken. We BBQ at least 3 times a week, any season, so we'll definitely get good use out of it.

I have had a crazy busy spring break. Crazy. Self-inflicted, but crazy, nonetheless.

So, to start...

I woke up on Saturday morning and was so upset with how disasterous the basement was that I packed up the family and we went shopping for a shelving unit. I couldn't find what I was looking for so I batted my eyelashes at my handy husband and we designed it and he built it for me. My hero.

Because we were putting in this ginormous unit, I wanted to paint down there - it was always way too dark for my liking. Because I wanted to change the colour, we figured I should do it right and we needed to reputty each and every drywall joint because it hadn't been done properly when the basement was finished. Because I was painting the walls, we decided the trim and doors also deserved to be painted (the previous owners had simply put them up primed, not painted). Because the paint colour I picked in the store turned out to be way more blue than what we had thought, we decided to paint two colours to hopefully tone down the blueness. Because we were painting down there anyways, we decided to get rid of the projector screen and use screen paint and just paint our "screen" on the wall.

Do you see how this project just snowballed bigger and bigger?? All because my daughter had dumped out all her toys. Sigh - if only I would have realized that building shelves doesn't necessarily mean it'll be clean down there, but alas, our basement is finished. Now, after all that, it happened so quickly that I don't even have any before pictures to show you. And the after pictures even have to wait because our Nikon has been sent away for repairs. I know, it's simply not fair.

Monday we headed into the city for a specialist appt with Gavin. He was scheduled for surgery for Thursday morning and this was just the pre-op so that we'd get the go ahead for that. There was confusion from the start when the nurses and receptionists were asking for paperwork and doctor's notes that I had no idea I was supposed to have.

Things only got more muddled when we spoke to the doctor who started hinting that surgery wouldn't be happening. By the end of the appointment, we were told that it would be rescheduled for a later date because the operating rooms had been overbooked and G's surgery wasn't urgent. I was annoyed because it all seemed to be a waste of time: we had already made arrangements for Chelsea's care, Chris had taken the week off work because we thought we'd be in the city for 3 days, and because I had really wanted the surgery to happen when I wasn't working. We also would have planned something more exciting than painting our basement, had we known we were not going to be dealing with G's surgery. But that God sure knows what He's doing, let me tell you. I'll get to that part in a sec.

Tuesday, I headed to Winnipeg with a fantastic friend. We've been known to get loud. It was the perfect, stress reliever day. We did a quick power shop and then we used our dealfind vouchers and visited Safire Hair and Esthetics. I had a mani, pedi, and a facial. It was a lot of fun. They even managed to give me a fake toenail. (Mine had fallen off a few weeks ago due to an unfortunate toe/stair meeting.) I do have before and after pics of that because that's just the kind of person I am.

(I am now wondering if this fake toenail was a good idea because I'm not sure how the real toenail will grow out, but we'll see what happens.)

Wednesday, we shipped Chelsea off to her Aunty's house just as we had planned, because she was very excited about her first sleepover. However, a few hours later, she was not quite as excited to come home, clutching a pail, getting sick. A few upsets and a good night's sleep and she was ready to go on Thursday.

However, Thursday, it was me who was clutching the pail. I woke up feeling fine but by 9 am, I was not in good shape and it only went from bad to worse. I was in bed from about 9 - 5, only getting up to well, you can imagine. This is where God's perfect timing all comes in. Had we gone ahead with Gavin's surgery, I would have been sick at the hospital. I wouldn't have been able to be there for Gavin and goodness knows how chaotic the day would have been with me being so sick. That God really knows what He's doing - just in case I didn't fully realize this already.

But, by Thursday night, the sickness was gone, Praise the Lord, and I worked on the basement, late into the evening. Friday brought on more time with the family, decorating a dirtbike cake, and more basement work time.

And that brings us to today. Lots of time outside with the kids, enjoying the amazing weather. Then a few finishing details on the basement, and I am done.

Alright - this blog post is severly lacking in interest or humour, but quantity counts for something, right?

Hey Look!!

It's a blog post. Okay, so it's a poor excuse for a blog post, but there's words and a picture, so it counts!

Thank you all for your patience and understanding as I switch over to private. I promise I'll be back soon, but life is so crazy right now and I'm a sucker for punishment. I woke up on Saturday morning and decided to fix our basement, build a custom shelving unit, re-mud and re-paint the existing drywall and hang some more drywall while we're at it.

Plus, we have another specialist appointment for this guy tomorrow, and his surgery is booked for Thursday at 8:45 am. He has a hydrocele that needs to be healed (or fixed by the dr), so we definitely appreciate your prayers this week! Now it's late, so I'm off with the promise that I will be back soon! Honest!

It's time

Hey folks!

I know there are a lot of you out there who read this blog, so I'm putting this out there. For the time being, I have to go private. I hate giving other people power, but my ever-rude anonymous commenter is ruining it for everyone. I've tried to ignore their comments, but it's to the point where I'm scared to share my heart for fear of what they'll say. I love blogging and I love having people read my blog, whether you comment or not, and that's why I hate going private. (Private just means that you need to sign in to read my blog. I know it's an extra step and it means that blog readers don't work, but, for now, it has to be done!)

So please, if you read my blog, even as a lurker, be sure to let me know if you want your email address added to the list. Hopefully I'll see you on the flip side (and yes, I really did just write that!). Night all!

Good things...

If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies. ~Author Unknown


Change is good, right? Right?

Currently, I'm in the midst of a change sandstorm. Everything seems to be changing and I'm embracing it. I'm the first to admit that I usually don't like change, but right now it all feels so right and so good. Of course I'm nervous, but I'm feeling strangely at peace. Life is so good right now and I can only see it getting better and better.

So here's to change and to butterflies!

blabbity blah blah

- It's been so busy. Lots going on at work, cakes still going full swing, doing some weight loss coaching, and just life in general. Ack. Even typing it all makes me tired.
- We hit up Disney on Ice. Chelsea loved it, but really didn't know Peter Pan or Lilo and Stitch.

-Her face lit up when Ariel came out on the ice though!

- Chelsea, high on root beer and cotton candy, pretending to be happy even though we had denied her the $10 slushie.

- Now that I'm in the maintenance stage of losing weight, I get to have a few guilt-free cheat days/meals/whatever. I have not cheated or eaten ANYTHING remotely unhealthy since Sept. 25th. All I wanted was carrot cake (from Funk's bakery), nachos (from BP) and red wine (from anywhere - lol!) I was actually really surprised at how nothing met my expectations. I truly am I changed person, but I won't lie. I did eat a lot of this ginormous plate of nachos. :D

- I picked up a chair for upstairs in our house and the kids both love it. Chris tried to get a picture of them nicely sitting together and this is the best we got.

- These two kids keep me hopping. I feel like my house is constantly a disaster zone: the floors are always dirty, the kitchen never clean and the laundry never ending. They play so nice together, but then moments later are screaming and yelling. And Gavin. Oh, sweet Gavin. He. is. so. busy. I can not stress this enough. He just doesn't sit still for any length of time. He tires me out.

- I've decided to tile a back splash in the kitchen and work slowly on repainting a lot of the inside of the house. I'm finding the builder's beige neutral to be so dark. I'm looking at lots of whites and brighter colors. However, I struggle to pick out colours and I usually just rely on other people to do it for me. Any takers?

- It's report card writing week this week. Be kind to the teachers in your lives, people. We need some extra encouragement, love and support this week. Well, at least I do!

Have a good one!

Last ones, I promise.

Someone recently commented that it was incredibly vain of me to get a photoshoot done of just myself - no husband, no kids, just me. I was hurt, but I guess depending on how you look at it, it might come across as vain.

I try not to talk about my weightloss. I didn't blog about it until recently, and in person, I don't make an issue out of it. I eat what I need to and want to and life goes on, really. I don't want it to become an issue. But losing weight is a tricky, tricky thing. It can affect relationships and change friendships.

But most importantly, it changes you, or I guess me in this case. I've changed. I'm so much healthier and active and positive than I was 6 months ago. I'm confident and outgoing. I feel much more true to myself.

But, at the same time, I still struggle with the fat girl mentality. I walk into a room and feel like I'm the biggest one in the room. I still avoid certain situations because I think people will judge me. There's that small voice in my head telling me that I'm too fat or not good enough. I know that it's not true in my heart, but it sure seems to be taking my brain a while to figure that out. I am still in disbelief in stores when I shop. It feels surreal to be in smaller sizes. Heck, I teared up in Reitman's a couple weeks ago.

So that's why I did the photoshoot. I needed to see what other people see. I needed evidence for those days when my brain is sending me negative messages. I needed to have pictures that I can look at to remind myself of all the changes that I have made. I'm not printing any pictures out or hanging them around the house. They will stay on my computer and yeah, I'll have a bunch of fun profile pics for a while, but that's it.

Tiff at tlp photography is a friend of mine, so it was awesome just to hang out and truly be myself. The first few pics are the out takes. I can't be serious for long and I definitely am not comfortable in front of the camera and despite my best efforts, cannot "smize" for the life of me and these pictures show that.

I am such a dork. I know. Admitting it is the first step, right?

After today, I promise not to talk about weightloss or this photoshoot any more. I know this blog has definitely been lacking lately, and I am going to make an effort to step it up a little.

I've shared a lot of the shoot on FB, so I'll leave you with these last two images.

Thank you to all my friends who've stood beside me on this journey. You've made me who I am today and I am so so grateful.